Piano Keys & Testimony  

I have been having a heck of time. Life has been… hard. 

I can admit that I have been struggling with anxiety over worldly concerns. 

Today, as I drove my almost-8-year-old son, AJ, to church for our Youth Sunday rehearsal, he said to me, “my friend has some burdens.” I asked what he meant, and he shared that his friend’s father passed away very recently and the loss is a burden to his friend. We talked about spiritual and emotional burdens. Then AJ said, “I’ve had some burdens, but I let God lift them.” 

Tears filled my eyes. 

I asked him if he wanted to talk more about that. He shared with me that losing family members (from all sides of his family, as he has my and my husband’s families as well as his biological father’s family) was emotional for him, but he trusted God with his feelings, and he feels better. 

“AJ,” I said from the front seat, trying not to choke on my unshed tears, “that’s called a testimony. When we share how God has been good to us, that’s our testimony.” 

Then, we got to church. In our student center, he played the song he’ll play on Sunday for the offertory music. “Jesus Loves Me” on the keyboard, the sound bouncing off of the cinderblock walls. The teen youth members clapped enthusiastically for him – “whoa, good job, AJ!” He beamed with pride. I felt it tug at my heartstrings, too. 

After that, I thought maybe he should practice on the piano in the sanctuary so he feels more comfortable before Sunday. Our music director – and my friend – offered to let a few members of the choir stay so he could practice being in front of an audience. 

Everyone at choir rehearsal stayed, clapped when he finished the last note, and then one sweet lady – who embodies what it means to be “church family” – asked him, “can you play and let us sing along?” 

The church felt FULL – full of steady little fingers on the keys, full of adult voices singing a song they’d known their whole lives, full of love. 

It took everything for me not to cry. (Don’t worry, I’m sure to cry on Sunday morning when the pews are full.) 

When we left the building, AJ said, “one day I’m going to do that for my job!” 

He’s caught the bug. Cooperative music. Communal worship. 

My anxieties seemed small. 

Through the testimony of a little boy in the backseat, and through the sound of a choir who loved a tiny little learning pianist, I was reminded today that the little bits of hell that creep into daily life haven’t got a single thing on the big God that we serve. 

Jesus loves me, this I know. 

I’ve got burdens, but God can lift them. 

A Good Friday Reflection 

If you know me personally, you might know that I am a denominational mutt when it comes to religion. My extended family roots are found in Catholicism, I was baptized and am currently a Methodist, my husband considered himself Lutheran until he joined our Methodist church, and I went to a Baptist college for undergrad. I have great respect for each of these Christian traditions, and for many, many more denominations. 

As a junior high student – before I moved to TN and before I was baptized or a church member – I remember hearing someone in my gym class say, “Man, Catholics are SO weird. They keep Jesus on the cross, but everyone knows he’s not there anymore. The grave was empty on Easter.” And, though I didn’t understand why, that comment did NOT sit right with my spirit. 

Now, as an active believer and a teacher of the Word, I know why it didn’t sit right and still doesn’t. 

YES – Jesus is off of the cross and out of the tomb – and PRAISE GOD for that! 

BUT, Jesus WAS nailed to the cross. He died a human death by crucifixion. He wore a crown of thorns, withstood the beating and flogging, and suffered the nails and the asphyxiation that accompanied crucifixion. He bled from his side, and He was closed in the tomb. 

An empty tomb is just an empty room if we don’t have the crucifixion. 

Without the suffering of the Messiah, we do not receive pardon for sin. Without the suffering, without the death, there is no atonement for our unrighteousness. 

Without Christ on the cross, our sins are still stains – not made white as snow – and our eternity is still dark. 

Christ WAS on the cross, and sometimes we need to remember that.

Years ago, when I was in a season of struggling, I realized I needed to remember Christ on the cross. I called my dad and asked for a crucifix – surely his Catholic family had one to spare.  They did – I was gifted the crucifix from my great grandfather’s funeral. And I hung it in my living room by my door, so that every day as I left my home in the morning, I remembered the sacrifice. And I remembered the love that comes from such sacrifice. 

That’s what Good Friday is… a reminder that Christ WAS on the cross – that He willingly died an excruciating death because of His great love for God’s creation. 

Yes, very soon we celebrate an empty tomb and a Risen Savior. But for now, on Good Friday and Holy Saturday, we sit in silence, pondering the sacrificial love and the suffering of the Messiah. 

There’s something holy about the sacrifice. 

There’s something holy about the silence.

And it all leads to salvation. 

Praise God for the hard gift of sacrifice, pain, and reconciliation. 

Resurrection is coming. 

Racism, a Reflection 

Another non-homemaker, non-parenting post, I know. Unusual, but these are unusual times. And I feel called to use any platform I have – no matter how small – to speak truth.

This reflection comes after seeing the horrendous social media post that President Trump made, featuring a variety of democrats as animals, including Former President Barack Obama and Former First Lady Michelle Obama being depicted as apes. As American history tells us, this is blatantly offensive and racist. 

My stomach turned when I saw the post. I have prayed, I have turned to scripture, and I have felt a righteous anger stir within me. 

These are my thoughts and reflections in that wake of that horrendous post…

Reflection

“Racism springs from the lie that certain human beings are less than fully human. It’s a self-centered falsehood that corrupts our minds into believing we are right to treat others as we would not want to be treated.” – Alveda King 

Luke 6:31: “Do to others as you would have them do to you.” – Jesus 

Luke 10:27: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” – Jesus 

To my friends of color: I am so sorry that we keep sliding backwards instead of pushing forward. There is no excuse for the inaccurate, hurtful, offensive, unjust, unkind mentality of so many of our neighbors and leaders. They are wrong. You are an image-bearer, made by the hands of God. And you deserve the same access to respect and dignity as any other and all other human beings, no exception. 

To my white friends: We must demand better for our fellow man and woman. We must not be silent in the face of discrimination, bigotry, and hatred. We must insist that all people are treated with dignity and respect, and we must not waiver in expecting equality for our neighbors in a nation that was once lovingly called “a melting pot.” 

To American political leaders, including the President and those who defend him:  You cannot invoke the name of God in the hopes of gaining political support one minute, and then turn around and demean people the next. It is despicable. It is unjust. It is unChristlike. 

Go and Have Mercy

Bear with me today, friends. In the midst of shootings and violence by ICE – that would not be forgiven or forgotten if conducted by traditional police forces – in our nation, I find myself in a period of reflection, prayer, and Biblical reading. I am seeking God’s face and His conviction for myself and for fellow believers.

This post is the result of that reflective time. I’m not sure what this is – a sermon outline, a mediation, a mess of theological thought… but I offer it to you the way it was offered to me: messy, but full of the Spirit and full of grieving and outcry and conviction and, yes, even – thankfully – grace.

“Go and Have Mercy”

Luke 10: 25-37 (NIV)

Excerpt from Luke 10 (but you should go read the full parable):

“Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?”

The expert in the law replied, “The one who had mercy on him.”

Jesus told him, “Go and do likewise.”

Reading Between the Lines:

“Which of these was a neighbor?” 

“The one who showed mercy and compassion; the one I didn’t want to be the hero of your parable, because he and I disagree on religious, political, and social traditions, and because we belong to different groups.” 

“Go and do as he did, he who you believe is unlike you.” 

The Takeaway:

Christlike character is not proven by our uniform or position, nor by our memberships to organizations or citizenships to countries. 

Christlike character is proven by our compassion and our faith in action.  

Do the words of your lips match the movement of your hands? Do the words of your Bible sit on a dusty shelf, or come alive in the movements of your body each day? 

Quotations for Further Reflection:

“It is no use walking anywhere to preach unless our walking is our preaching.” – St. Francis of Assisi

“There are two things to do about the Gospel – believe it and behave it.” – Susanna Wesley

“Let me not only be called a Christian, but prove to be one.” – St. Ignatius of Antioch

“Actions speak louder than words; let your words teach and your actions speak.” – St. Anthony of Padua

“While you are proclaiming peace with your lips, be careful to have it even more fully in your heart.” – St. Francis of Assisi 

Extra – A Blessing

Today I bought my kids new shoes – not because they needed them, but because I wanted to and I know they’ll get used. 

A few years back, I was single-momming it with my little AJ. A single mom, working two jobs, and still sort of struggling. AJ had absolutely everything he needed (because single mom magic is real), including at least two pairs of shoes in his size always – but buying extra wasn’t a luxury I had. Extras came from gifts from loved ones. 

But today I bought all three of my boys EXTRA. Just because… Because they’d like them. Because they could make good use of them. 

They’re not fancy – they’re Walmart shoes – but they’re certainly EXTRA. 

When we put our Walmart bags in the car, I  looked at my husband and said, “buying just-because shoes for our kids makes me feel like I hit a mom goal.” He just smiled at me and said “I know.” 

Admittedly, in this economy, everybody is still struggling. It’s not easy. But with a partner who prioritizes the same things as me, and with a lot of time and hard work, today was an EXTRA kind of day. And this evening, each of my boys has a new pair of shoes – just because – at the foot of their beds. 

My heart feels full. (It really is the little things that aren’t so little at all.) 

A Gift in Memory

Last night, I was given the most thoughtful gift I have received in quite some time.

Before I assisted with our Blue Christmas worship service (meant for those grieving through the holidays) at the church I serve, a member of our grief group ran up to me. She handed me a clear bag with a green sweatshirt in it and said in a hurry, “this isn’t a Christmas gift – this is in memory of your cousin. Some of the proceeds go to suicide prevention, and I wanted you to have it.”

The tears pricked my eyes instantly.

I lead our grief group because this special friend, Wayna, is a widow and asked me if we offered anything at the church for those experiencing loss. Together, we got the ball rolling on a grief group. And as she grieves her husband, I grieve my cousin, Rachel, who ended her life too soon.

This is an extremely thoughtful, generous gift. I held the bag to my chest as I hugged her. For one of the few times in my life, I felt speechless.

When you lose someone you love to suicide, you can’t help but wonder what you could have done to help – how you could have loved harder, been more available… the list goes on and on. I have struggled with my grief, which is not unusual, but I have had the unique and immense privilege of walking through grief with some of the most wonderful people who have supported me as I have sought to support them in their own loss journeys, too. 

Thank you to my friend, Wayna, for the gift. Thank you for knowing my heart and walking alongside me through grief. I treasure your friendship and this precious gift. 

Cut-Corners Swedish Meatballs

While it may only be the second week of November, and while that may not usually be the traditional winter-weather season of East Tennessee, yesterday we had snowfall. 

My sweet boys were absolutely enthralled by the snow. Here’s a sweet photo of Teddy (age 3) watching the snow come down through our back door onto our porch.  

Needless to say, it’s quickly become the season for layers, sweatshirts, and fleece jackets. And when it’s cold, I crave a warm, filling meal for dinner. (Luckily, my husband keeps up really well with the weather, so I usually have a heads up on when to buy hearty foods for cold snaps. So I was prepared for this week!) 

Last night, I made the absolute easiest warm and cozy meal: Cut-Corners Swedish Meatballs! 

I love traditional Swedish meatballs, homemade, with hand-rolled meatballs, lots of extra seasonings, and a thick and creamy gravy sauce. But homemade meatballs are a weekend food in our two-income home, a luxury for calendar days that might not require dinner in a half hour. 

And so what’s a girl to do when she’s got a half hour to make it? 

Cue my Cut-Corners Swedish Meatballs recipe! This is designed to be easy, filling, and yummy – for a busy momma hen, wife, and/or working professional. 

Here’s the fastest way to a simple – but yummy – Swedish meatball recipe! 

Ingredients: 

  • Frozen precooked beef meatballs (1/2 to 2/3 of the package) 
  • 2 packets of brown gravy mix 
  • Egg noodles (1/2 to 2/3 of the package)
  • Garlic powder 
  • Black pepper 

First, arrange your meatballs in a baking pan and cook in the oven, per the instructions on the package.

Next, while the meatballs heat fully in the oven, boil water. Once boiling, add in your egg noodles and cook until tender. Then drain the pasta. 

Then, make your two gravy packets per provided package instruction. Once it’s to the preferred thickness, add in some garlic powder and black pepper – to your preferred taste. 

To assemble, simply layer in a dish or bowl the following: egg noodles, meatballs, and gravy. 

Side note: I chose to also serve Italian seasoned green beans with my dish. (These are easy, too – canned green beans, heated in oil, garlic powder, and Italian seasonings.) This addition is, frankly, because I am a toddler mom and ant to at least offer a vegetable with each meal (not that they always choose to partake in it). 

This was so good – my husband and I both enjoyed it – and it definitely gave us that full-in-the-belly and warm-from-the-inside feeling we were craving with the cold weather! 

What’re your favorite go-to cold weather meals? Comment below – and bonus points if they are MEGA easy for folks with a jam-packed calendar! 

A Positive Perspective

A theological thought for the evening… 

It is widely believed that Paul wrote the book of Philippians while in jail, and yet it is often called “the book of joy” by students of the Word. Jail may not seem like a likely place to author “the book of joy,” though, right? 

Paul finds joy and spiritual contentment despite being in jail because… 

✨ Perspective is everything. ✨

In Philippians 2:14-15, Paul writes: 

“Do all things without grumbling or disputing, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish…”

In Philippians 4:8, he writes: 

“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” 

Paul finds joy and spiritual contentment, even in jail, because he is focused on God – on doing his best to shy away from complaint and to run toward praising the good things of God. He shifts focus from negativity to positivity, always focusing on the same concept that James (brother of Jesus) writes about in his own book, James 1:17, which says, “Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above…” 

Paul and James seem to agree that there is goodness in life, no matter the situational circumstance, because God Himself is good. 

The perspective shift from grumbling and complaining to praising and gratitude makes it not only possible, but also probable, that we can and will find joy and spiritual contentment in any situation. 

Because perspective truly is everything. 

From Impossible to Possible

Royal Oak Presbyterian Church, Marion, VA

In Genesis 18, this question is asked: “Is anything too hard for the Lord?” And this answer is given: “No, nothing is too hard for Him.”

Genesis, which aims to show us God’s omnipotence, tells us that nothing is too much, too difficult for God – because God is all powerful.

Later, as we progress through the story of faith in the Bible, we find out that God shares power with us through grace.

In Matthew 19, we find out this good news: “With men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

God’s power makes things possible for us.

So the concerns that are currently weighing heavily on me? My own solutions and answers may feel impossible right now – but I trust that God will provide power and possibility.

Mexican Lasagna

I made Mexican food for dinner on Tuesday – yes, Taco Tuesday – and I realized as I prepared a favorite easy dish that I may never have shared this one on the blog! 

Some call it “taco bake” and others call it “Mexican lasagna.” At my house, we just call it “yummy.” 

This is an easy layered dish. You can make it with anything – and you can certainly add vegetables if the humans in your house will eat them (the guys in mine will not). Let me share what I do, and then you can let your mind wander with the possibilities! 

I start by browning meat (sometimes I use ground beef but a lot of times I use ground turkey). Then, I add a packet of taco seasoning. You can use whatever brand you like! I usually use ground turkey and low-sodium taco seasoning. 

While the meat browns and seasons, I preheat my oven to 350F. 

Once the meat is browned and covered well in seasoning, I lay a soft flour tortilla on the bottom of a pan or baking dish. (I do recommend a walled baking dish, like a cake pan of some size, rather than a sheet pan). Then layer in queso, cooked meat, salsa, and shredded Mexican cheese. Add another tortilla, and then all the inside ingredients again. Repeat one or two times. Then, on the top layer, use just cheese. 

For the layers, you could also use refried beans, Mexican or Spanish rice, or any number of vegetables or guacamole inside some of the layers for a variety of flavors if your family likes that. My boys are a little more plain Jane, so we don’t currently experiment with other options, but I’ve had different versions, and they’re all delicious. 

Once you’ve layered it all and finished the top with lots of cheese, place it in a 350F oven for at least 15 minutes so that it all melts together wonderfully and comes out gooey and yummy! 

When serving, cut into sections. (Pro tip: I often cut the smaller tortillas into four sections using a pizza cutter.) 

Enjoy a delicious and easy Mexican lasagna! 

Let me know if you’ve tried this recipe or something similar! I’d love to hear from you in the comments.